I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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