Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
