Whod you bang
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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