Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
they're like a gay fantastic four
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
