Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
