dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
