I am puke
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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