I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
