I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Someone stole a lamp last night.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
