you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize