no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
