She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
