Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
They have beer where we have blood.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
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