he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
