Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
