Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
