never play flip cup with pint glasses
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
