Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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