i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
