What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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