we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
