In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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