youre lurking in front of me
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
