am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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