Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Randomize
