so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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