some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
