I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
It's like God shit irony all over that family
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
