Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
