it wasn't lemon gatorade
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
