I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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