He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
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