Joe is yelling at the trees again.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
