and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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