And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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