I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize