I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
