Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I had to cum in my sink.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
