whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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