I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Randomize
