Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
