May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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