i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
