yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
