Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize