Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Randomize
