I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
two words...techno handjob
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
