hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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