trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
