I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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